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March 22, 2005

Cell Phone Virus

Shennanigans! Shennanigans I say.
Viruses on your cell phone.
CNN virus article

People just have a little too much time on their hands (he says as he types into his blog, irony thickly wafting though the air). This virus does not delete info, destroy the phone, or make you tell your cell phone that you are an idiot every month. It does the most insidious thing it can do to your cell ... it DRAINS THE BATTERIES. Talk about hitting a guy where it hurts.

But this too I have a solution for. I believe all hackers really just need girlfriends (or boyfriends in that one and a million case). If these guys had girlfriends they would not have the time to come up with these hacks/viruses. I know they live by the same mantra that I do -- Òwhat ifÓ -- two of the most powerful words in the English language. Trust me, gentleman, the most interesting thing in the world to try to get your head around is the mind of a woman. Figuring out what you said last month that is causing the silent treatment will be just as time consuming and rewarding as getting low level access to the Pentagon. Figuring out what to say or not say when she says we need to talk -- just as rewarding as cracking WAP encryption.
As men we are not complex. Hell we are driven by three top categories -- food, fun, and friction. All male actions are attempts to get something in one of these categories. Hackers of the world: Spend more time on another category, your pick. May I suggest the category that "girlfriend" falls into? It's far more interesting then the food category.

Still not ready for the real thing? Start off slowly Virtual girlfriend Vivienne may give you the introduction that you need. If you still need to hack something, try to get the Mother In Law add-on to like you.

Posted by Kwaku at March 22, 2005 11:36 AM

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