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June 13, 2005

Of Weak Arms and Weirdness

I came across this:
Madrid Pillow fight club
Madrid held its 1st Pillow fight club tonight.
OK, I am all for crazy things on the Net. Have you seen my blog? But this is just weak. Being a passivist, I think the idea of a fight club is deplorable, but at the same time, I do understand the desire to connect with something more primal and possibly noble--there are just less masochistic ways to do it. I am an avid reader of Eastern battle and samurai philosophy books, but that's another story.

You should not want to go out and find a beating. Have you ever been punched in the face? It hurts badly and it is damn sobering. Everything instantly turns white, then black, then shifts to red. Reality quickly comes back into focus through this red haze. I guess the purpose of the light show is to let your ego have time to leave the room. Yep, illusions of grandeur fall aside and you're faced with the decision to cover up or knuckle up. In my case, I chose option three, I made a snide remark and walked away, accompanied by my way-too-eager-to-fight best friend. I was even more upset. I got hit in the head--it wasn’t like I could even spit a little blood as I left. What a rip. Faces heal, but I suspect my insult is still gnawing away at my attacker. Well, at least I kind of hope it is.

"But, Kwaku," you say. "This fight club is with pillows--surely this is OK. And besides, they are trying to recapture the playfulness of their younger years. As a kid, a gallon of milk was heavy. Now, I can bench-press well over half my body weight, and if you look at the pictures there are girls involved. You know that that’s an accident waiting to happen. Let me explain. Now, in my younger years in boarding school I have had many a pillow fight. My roommate Oliver Miller and I would move the furniture and beat the tar out of each other until we had gotten rid of the stressors of the day. Interesting note: You can knock a person out if you hit them hard enough with a pillow to the back of the head. Sorry Oli. One day a girlfriend insisted on giving it a try. Two things here--girls do not respect the genital no-fly-zone rule. And if you hit a girl with about 40% of the force a guy would hit another guy with--well let’s just say when the sniffling starts,GAME OVER.

So to the members of this Pillow Fight Club “it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye,”and on you I call Shenanigans

Posted by Kwaku at June 13, 2005 11:26 AM

Comments

I've always been mystified by the pillow fight idea myself because the way people talk about it, it's just this completely harmless thing, but the fact of the matter is that you can still hurt someone pretty bad if you hit them hard with a big pillow. Even if the actual pillow hit isn't what does it, you could easily knock someone into a wall or make them fall on something. They're a lot more dangerous than most people seem to think, especially if you get people who are taking it seriously as a competitive thing.

Posted by: Christiana Ellis at June 16, 2005 9:18 AM

We all forget that the word "pillow" does not change the word "fight."

Posted by: Kwaku at June 20, 2005 1:49 PM

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